Nothing makes a person more productive than the last minute.

U.S. Army General George S. Patton once said, "All men are afraid in battle. The coward is the one who lets his fear overcome his sense of duty. Duty is the essence of manhood."


Nearly a week and a half ago, I was tasked to deploy to Afghanistan in a moments notice. And while I am not man, nor do I expect to see much of "battle" while I am deployed, I will openly admit that I'm still scared. I'm not so much scared for my well being or safety, though that does play a part, but just scared of the unknown.


Like many Joint Expeditionary Tasked (JET) Airmen, I have no idea what I'll be doing in Afghanistan once I get there. It's been hard to set my expectations because I don't know what to think.


A JET Airman is essentially someone who is pulled from another service to fill an Army manning vacancy.


I've been told that I'll be doing my job as a photographer and writer, just as an Airman attached to an Army unit. I've also been told that I won't have anything to do with public affairs, and that I'll just be training the Afghan National Army. It's hard to say, as both are strong possibilities.


In the coming months I'm more worried about my husband having to wear his "big boy pants" and pay the bills by himself. I'm worried about my dog, Indy, my cat, Kitty (she did have a name, but it just.. morphed into.. Kitty..) and my little betta fish, Blue. (Blue has been alive for 8 months!!! I've never kept a fish alive more than 24 hours! Tough little bugger even jumped out of his bowl once and laid on the counter for about 20 minutes before I came in and freaked out and threw him back in his water.)
But back on topic..


My husband and I have prayed hard and so have our friends, family and church congregation back home. I've decided that God, for whatever reason, wants me to go and has a plan. It's hard to see it now while I can't help but make a mental list of all the things I'm going to miss. Things I had planned on being here for and had looked forward to for sometime, like Tyler's birthday, the Marine Corps Ball, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year, etc.

But nevertheless, it's my duty, my responsibility and my pleasure to serve everyday as I do.

As for right now, I'm off to spend my last couple days scooping cat turds out of the litter box, doing laundry, yelling at the dog and cooking for my husband a few last times. :)

How quickly we forget not to take it all for granted.